"Casualties"

You know what's interesting? Looking at the numbers of people who were killed and trying to make sense of it. Ok actually I'm here to argue that it's not that interesting. I see foreigners claim that Israel is horrible because of the number of people who were killed in Lebanon or Iran or Gaza, which is much much higher than the number of people killed in Israel. I see Israelis tie themselves up in knots trying to explain the difference.

And yeah, it's crazy that so few Israelis have been killed, but that's the wrong number to look at. At this point in the current war with Iran I think seventeen Israelis have died and about 3500 have been injured. Now that's a wild statistic to look at. The question that needs to be asked is, what factors determine the number of casualties?

Let's talk about car accidents for a minute. I have a friend who used to work for the national authority for road safety here in Israel and she told me a little about how they do statistics there. Her point was that when you're looking at severity of car accidents you have to look at injuries the same way you look at death, because some horrible accidents leave people severely injured for the rest of their lives, but they could have died. Sometimes the difference between life and death has nothing to do with the severity of the accident - maybe it's the medical care, speed of ambulance arrival, or just the exact angle that the passenger hit the windshield. It could be the make of the car or the age of the victim. And of course the same accident would have more casualties if there were more people in the car besides the driver.

Back to war, I think the point is clear. I'll leave you to draw your own conclusions.

Looking for a Good Word for This

 You know "mansplaining," right? When a man tells a woman how she should feel or react to a situation she's going through that he's never experienced? Like periods or childbirth or abortion. It's an excellent word in my opinion, but it needs to be expanded. First of all because it's not only men, and it's not only related to sexual health. Second, because I can think of at least two other situations where such "splaining" happens to me and has nothing to do with gender.

So help me come up with a word? Here's where I need it:

1. Parenting. You know how many non-parents can tell you how to behave with your child?? I even used to do it before I had kids - judge parents and think I knew better, just because I read something in Readers Digest once. It can even be other parents telling you how to parent your child, just because *their* child acts a certain way. Man, I was such a good parent before I had kids.

Anyway "parent-splaining" is terrible, help!

2. Living in the Middle East. So many well-meaning westerners can tell me all about war, like which acts of war are moral or legal. Let me just say this - if you're talking about war with the language of moral philosophy, you're definitely privileged to never have experienced it. Someone called it "west-splaining" but that's a terrible word too, it just doesn't roll off the tongue at all.

Find me a better word.

Thank you.