How to Survive an Apocalypse

No, I'm not going to teach you to cheat death - no one can cheat death. But it turns out that the apocalypse can be really long, like, years, and that many people will survive it and you could be one of them! So here goes: an Israeli guide to surviving the apocalypse. 

1. Drink water from a wine glass, it feels fancy.

2. Make your ice coffee in a beer stein.

3. Make plans. Doctor's appointments, birthday parties, fun outings - keep them in your calendar! You might have to cancel them but you might not so it's better to have them planned.

4. Find your style. All the clothes you don't wear because they're outside your comfort zone? Who the fuck cares?? Wear what you want. Forget all the descriptions you've given yourself over the years ("classic," "modest," "tomboy" - I'm sure you have a few you can think of), just dress however.

5. Stop buying crap. Make a shopping list and stick to it, not just for groceries! Need a new kitchen appliance? Add to your shopping list. Need a new pair of jeans? List. No impulse buying, it's truly a waste.

6. Work less. This should be the first item on the list but obviously you still need money, so figure out how to earn money while still working less. Fewer hours, fewer commutes.

7. Learn. The best way to feel good about all the horrible things in the world is to realize that it's all happened before.

8. Ask yourself: if time and money weren't an issue, what course would you want to take? What skill would you want to learn? Then find a way to do it.

9. Eat good food.

10. Plant seeds. Especially plants that give you food.

There it is, in no particular order.